Over the course of the day, I developed endless spiel.

For example, on my teaching background:

That inner-city school where I’ve been student teaching isn’t nearly as bad as people make it out to be. I haven’t been stabbed once.

One-liners give me something to say while I’m answering the question. Given that their rehearsed cleverness and adroitness of delivery stands out, I’ve also found that it helps to unabashedly refer to my one-liners as “lines I’ve used around the job fair” right after I use them.

I had a few more standbys, and I thought you’d get a kick out of them.

Stating the obvious:

Kids are kids are kids. They’re the same everywhere.

Jabbing at a rival district:

The kids at White Kids’ Unified don’t have any better excuses. They have richer excuses.

When describing why I appreciated kids so much:

I used to think that my favorite age was the 4 and 5 year olds, but once I started student teaching I realized that high school seniors really aren’t all that different.

A bowl of sour-and-spicy meatball soup during lunchtime, bolstered by pure adrenaline, kept me on my feet, but by the end of a 7-hour day of interviews, my ever-abundant energy was fully sapped. It’s been a long time since I was so tired.

When outside interviews.

I wanna be sedated.

Guess which one quotes The Ramones. I dare you.

On an unrelated note, a Japanese girl is from Kansas.

 


  1. 20-20-24 hours ago ….

    You crack me up, man.

    Kevin

  2. Love your sense of humour. I hope I can do something towards the ‘day in a hyperbole’ that even resembles something like you humour.

  3. It isn’t every day that I get compliments like that; thanks.

  1. 1 Teachers’ “Free” Business Cards « On the Tenure Track

    […] last paycheck on cheap business cards. I had figured that having a cards would play better at my job fair than being extravagantly and […]




Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s



%d bloggers like this: